There is so much animosity surrounding the fact that Master and me are married, and I truly could not tell you why. When people find out (in person) that we’re married, we get comments like:
“Wow, I didn’t realize people still do that!”
“Oh you poor man” (To Master)
Online I get told all the time how weird it is for someone in such an alt lifestyle is actually married. I also take flak for the fact that we do not play exclusively. (Why would you want to marry someone and then still have sex or playtime with other people?)
Well, here they are. My reasons why I am married to Master. Firstly, since I consider myself to be pansexual, I see myself as requiring three types of people on the whole to feel “complete”. I don’t look at Master as my other half, I see him as my other “third”. I am still seeking my final third, and goodness only knows if I will ever find my last “piece”.
The truth of the matter is that marriage is no longer about love. It’s more of a legal thing. In the beginning of our relationship (I am a much healthier person now) I found myself in the emergency room, and they would not let Master in to see me no matter what. In some places (including where we lived at the time) only family is allowed to see you. I do NOT want my family in an emergency room with me. I love my mother, but she has this habit of making everyone around her nervous. Truly, the last thing I (or anyone) needs in that situation is more stress. I want my other third. I want Master. Without marriage, that was not possible 90% of the time.
In the same medical vein, if something ever happened to me, I would want to make sure that Master had complete and utter say on whether or not to keep me on life support. Again, I love my family, but I do not trust that they would make the right decision. Master knows me inside and out and much better than they do. I would not feel safe having anyone but Master choose. I know he wouldn’t let me go without reason, but I also know he wouldn’t keep me here needlessly either.
If I were to die, Master knows the exact funeral I would want. As painful as it is to say, yes, I have thought about my death in the past. It isn’t something I dwell on, but I am not one of those 20-somethings who believe it is impossible for them to die. He knows how I want to leave this world. My family, no matter how much I voice my opinions will never know me that well and will do whatever they like when I die. This I am sure of. At the end of the day, Master will take care of my funeral the way I want to go out – I know this.
Also in the same “death” vein, I would want to make sure that anything of value of mine would go directly to the man I married, the man I love more than anything. I would not want anything of mine falling to the wrong people. Marriage sees to it that my possessions truly do become HIS possessions.
I’m not saying that I do not LOVE Master. Of course I do. Love was just one of the last reasons I had on my mind when I chose to marry him. I am more than capable of loving people without a little slip of paper to tell me that I do. Marriage for me is more about legalities. I do not and will never regret my decision. I love him with all my heart. The very fact that I am willing to give over control of my very life in the event of a life-threatening accident totally to his decision should say that. I just needed the government to hear my voice in those matters as well.