Improved

Not perfect, but improved. For me, the real measure of how well I am doing can usually be summed up by asking me this question:

“How much are you camming?”

If I can’t cam, things are pretty bad. If I can cam a little (say, an hour a day), then things could be better. If I am camming a lot, then things are going well! The past couple of days have been anything but perfect, but the important thing is: I am on cam, so I am getting better all the time. =^^=

Right now, I’m at the point where the majority of my day-to day is pretty decent.  I can fix meals, I can do laundry, I can do dishes, I can cam.  I sometimes have to take a break to elevate my legs, but that’s OK.  I can live with that.  What’s going to suffer is my workouts, which is just incredibly frustrating.

Right before this whole stupid setback, I was swimming laps for a minimum of thirty minutes a day, and sometimes up to an hour. Then we would even goof off, so sometimes we would wind up swimming two hours a day.  Yesterday, we went to the rec center.  Master decided that I was going to swim (not laps, just splash around) for about fifteen minutes, and we could tack five minutes per day onto that.  Once I was up to an hour, we could think about doing laps.  Well, I failed.  It wasn’t a total fail.  I mean, I didn’t faint, but I was extremely lightheaded when we left there, so Master decided I’m not ready for swimming.

What are we doing?  Five minute walks, once per hour when Master is home.  If I survive without an issue, we’re going to kick it up to ten minutes three times a day, and so on.  So here I am again, back at square one.  I know I can do this.  It’s frustrating as Hell that whenever I seem to really get a good stride going with my workouts, that I get bumped back down to bullshit levels of fitness.

A lot of people ask me why I don’t just give up on workouts altogether.  Mainly it’s family and a couple of close friends, but the truth is, the less active I am, the worse the POTS is.  When I was stuck on the couch for three or so months in a boot from breaking my foot last year, I spent a lot of that time with really bad POTS symptoms.  So it’s just one of those things.  Can’t live with it, can’t live without it.  I really hope that in time I will get back where I was, and even better than that.  =^^=

EDITED on 8/1/2013 TO ADD:  Maybe I’m not as good as I thought, yet.  Master and me went out last night to run errands, and, of the three or four stores we usually go to – I only made it through one store before I got really sick and had to go home.  This might..  Take some more time than I thought.  We’re going to try again tonight.  The errands have to get run one way or another, and even if it winds up taking us doing things one store per day for a while, we will get there.  ::Guzzles Pedialyte and elevates legs above head::

6 thoughts on “Improved

  1. I never understood how someone could not understand the need to control the symptoms overall or make yourself worse now for healing later.

    Also, I am sure you have told them that you have told them that you found exercise helped, but they won’t let it go. I have the same problem with my aunt even after I repeatedly tell her my Dr’s instructions which contradicts hers. I may have said this before, I can’t remember. I have heard the same complaint from friends with chronic conditions, their family wants to help, but sometimes they get annoying.

    • @Gaia Yeah, it’s frustrating. It is like they think the exercise is the root cause of the problem, and if I sat still I would be perfectly fine. That’s not it at all though. >.< At least they are well-meaning even though they are misguided.

  2. Sending more healing thoughts to you, Kitty. <3

  3. Goodness, a non-stop battle and continuous cycle of fighting to stay healthy is not a fight for a lesser kitten! Here’s to your resilient spirit and strong support system! Sending good vibes and healing energy. xox

    • Thanks @Mrs. Maguire I am trying, but lately, just feels like failing. I am sure I will get through this stronger than before though. :)