Wanting What You Can’t Have

I think it’s funny the way things wax and wane.  Master and be both get really bored of playtime if it contains the same thing over and over again.  For example, we both love electricity, but if every single session had electricity, we’d get bored.  It’s the same concept with all our other kinks: feet, smoking, impact play, spankings, breath play, etc etc.  The theme is always the same: power exchange, but how that theme is expressed has to be ever changing.  Master himself will go through time periods where he’s very rope-heavy with our play (for example), and that’ll last for two or three weeks before he puts the ropes down.  I don’t mean to say that we would do the same thing each time we play, just that the main event would be rope of some kind.  It’ll be the same sort of thing with wax, or scalpels, or cock sucking, or canes, or whatever. 

Then, there’s blood play.  Blood play is a relatively new thing for Master and me, but we have been actively doing it for about a year and a half.  Since we started, we have done blood play about once a month.  (There are only about six posts where I share our blood play experiences, because I don’t actually talk about it every time we do blood play.  Sometimes there’s no camera, sometimes there are just special bits I don’t want to share, and sometimes I feel the experience was too similar to past ones to blog about.) 

Blood play isn’t something we can do for five or six weeks at a time and have it be the main theme.  For one thing, it is somewhat expensive.  Sure, all the bits and bobs are somewhat inexpensive on their own (except maybe the Tegaderm), but when you consider that each item has to be disposable for the most part, it can get a bit pricey.  (There is some debate about whether or not you can reuse scalpels, I am not here to weigh in on that debate.  Master uses a new scalpel on me every time, that’s just how we do things.)  But also, since I am a slow healer, Master only likes to make one mark that will require care for several days in a row.  I go to the doctor a lot and as I enjoy being taken seriously by said doctors, we don’t like the idea of sending me to the doctor with a thousand bandages here and there.  One at a time is more than enough.

Thing is, as I’m anemic right now, even getting blood drawn is a bit of an issue for me.  I need every drop of blood that I can get, and even having my menstrual cycle is just crippling.  Whenever my cycle ends I always feel like I have to start all over again with the iron.  It isn’t that dramatic, but I definitely feel a lot worse at the end of my period than I did before I started.  While I wait on surgery to correct that, we have to be careful.

Of course, while Master and me wait (semi) patiently to have our newest and most intimate kink back, we keep scheming. 

“I can’t wait to try ______ kind of blood play with you.”  “We need to practice _______ more!”  “I thought of the perfect design to draw on your back next!”

-.-  Waiting is difficult.  Of course, we have all manner of other kinks to keep us occupied, but it’s funny how you always want to do that one thing that you aren’t supposed to be doing.  And, it’s funny how I sit there, eating my iron fortified foods thinking silly things like:

“I’m doing this to get my blood counts up SO MASTER CAN CUT ME!”

Slave girls.  We’re hopeless.

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