Don’tist

Running around is still in full swing.  Master is still trying to get all the paperwork in.  We’re actually getting really annoyed. Every time Master sends in paperwork for one thing, he gets hit with another piece of paperwork, and told “this is the last thing, I swear.”  Uh-huh.  Generally, because of the types of jobs Master is getting hired for, it takes about two weeks to get everything completely done and to get things started.  We’re already at the three-week point though.  I’ve expressed concerns on whether Master would even be starting this job, and he admitted he’s getting slightly nervous too.  We’re so frustrated we’re almost ready to wash our hands of the thing and just look for permanent work again.  At this point, we’re still hoping we’ve gotten all the paperwork in and it’s a matter of time.  ::Huff::

Once Master starts up the new job, it’ll be a lot harder to get all the little bullshit done, so we’re trying to tuck in the corners.  One such corner was my dental work.  We hadn’t been to the dentist in over a year due because we didn’t have insurance for it and after we got dental, every time we set up a dentist appointment I wound up in the hospital and we cancelled and rescheduled.  Dental work when you already feel like shit isn’t really the best.

So I went in and got my exam and got my cleaning.  My exam was pleasant.  The technician working with me was nice, we joked a bit about boys, and it was painless.  The total damage after the xrays and pictures were taken?  Four cavities.  Considering right before we lost our insurance I had three small ones to fill I could live with that.  One extra in a year is pretty good for me.  My teeth are crumbly and they constantly chip on things, etc.

She even pointed out that two of the cavities that I had were not new per se.  They were from old fillings falling out, and she was surprised I wasn’t in more pain from them.  Most people whose fillings fall out come in crying.  I’m weird with pain I guess.  Certain things are intolerable, and certain things I barely notice.  One of those fillings falling out I did notice, because when we were out at the casino (before Master lost his job) I felt a sharp pain in my tooth, and when I went to the car I noticed that the tooth was bleeding a little bit and there was a V shaped chip in it.  I had been drinking iced tea when it happened.  Like I said, I have fragile teeth.  I went to the dentist though, and he completely blew me off.  He told me all my teeth were chippy, and that there was no reason to bother fixing it.  I told him I’d never had a tooth bleed before, and I was sure something wasn’t right.  Not to mention, I felt completely embarrassed by it because it was an obvious nick in the tooth (plus, it was one of my two front teeth, so obvious whenever I had smiled or talked).  He didn’t fix it.  I thought that was really weird though, because we had plenty of insurance money left and dentists generally want to make money.  Also, he tried to get me to get a root canal that day on a tooth that wasn’t even hurting.  Maybe my “chip” was small potatoes to him and not worth enough money.  Either way, we didn’t go back because he felt scammy to us.

So, everyone being really nice at the exam made me feel a little bit more relaxed.  I went in for my cleaning two days later.  It was the worst cleaning I’ve ever had.  I have never had a cleaning hurt.  The person doing my cleaning was rather impersonal and she was in a huge rush.  I figured that maybe she was told she could go home as soon as she was finished with me.  Regardless, she kept scratching my gums with the scraper (because she was in such a rush) and she did a lousy job flossing.  I left with my gums all bloody which is not the case generally because I do a good job brushing.  I was annoyed because I would keep saying “owe” or “you’re hurting me” and she would just keep going like I hadn’t said anything.  That’s never happened before.  Usually, when I say “owe” the hygienist or dentist will be a little gentler.  It feels like shit to be sitting in the chair and have someone not even try to make you more comfortable.

Master had his cleaning the next day, and he said he got someone who was really nice and it didn’t hurt at all.  (Figures.)  Master also had three cavities filled that day, and he said he wasn’t in any pain and everyone was really gentle with him.  I figured that maybe I just got a grumpy lady or something, and I decided to go in and get my four cavities done.

I was really nervous, as I always am with the first dental work done by a new dentist.  I always ask for carbocaine because I can’t have epinephrine.  Every now and then, a dentist thinks it is funny to inject me with epinephrine anyway.  I don’t fucking appreciate that.  I’ve had every surgery ever done without epinephrine.  Ablation, foot surgery, port-a-cath.  ALL done without epinephrine.  It is well-known that POTS patients cannot have epinephrine.  It really fucks with us.  I am always up front with each dentist I meet the very first time I meet them.  They all say they are okay with it, but I’m hard to numb with local anesthetics because of the Ehlers-Danlos, and a lot of them will spring epinephrine on me anyway.  After, I hear all sorts of bullshit like “this is only 2% epinephrine, you can’t react to it.”  Yes I fucking do.  That’s why I take a LOT of fucking medicine as well as weekly infusions to help control my POTS.  So fuck off with that.  I even write in the margins on my paperwork “I do not consent to epinephrine.”  They all know ahead of time.  They’re trying to sneak it past me, and I will not put up with that ever.  Fuck no.  I don’t have this much trouble with MDs because most of them have heard of POTS.  I have yet to meet a dentist who has, though I know they exist.

The dentist came in, and I reminded her about the epinephrine and I asked what she would use.  She told me that the carbocaine wasn’t long lasting, and it was up to me but she’d rather I use the novocaine.  No.  I told her they removed wisdom teeth with carbocaine, they can use it for cavities thank you very much.  She agreed and I’m pleased to say that she did not actually use any novocaine on me, so that is a plus.  It’s the only plus, though.

Before she numbed me, she looked in my mouth and said that she saw three more serious chips that needed to be taken care of that day (if I wanted).  She even showed them to Master.  Master said that yes, they were obvious, and yes we could do them that day.  She scolded me a bit about not wearing my mouth guard (or else they wouldn’t chip so much) but Master stood up for me and said I wear it every night.  The thing is custom made and comfortable, so I have no issue wearing it at night.  She apologized.  Still annoying.

So, she numbed me.  The first shot was somewhat painful.  I asked her to stop three-quarters of the way through, and she didn’t.  She just told me to breathe because we were almost done.  There’s your first strike.  You could have just stopped for a second and given me a moment to breathe.  That’s literally what every dentist I have ever had has done.  No.  She was kind, but told me to suck it up.  Uncool.  I was in tears.   I didn’t feel the second shot because I was partially numb from the first shot.  So it went okay.

The third shot was a little bit ouchy, but nothing I couldn’t handle.  No tears.  They had to do two shots there to get me numb enough.

The fifth shot was the real problem.  The second it went in, it felt wrong.  I’ve had a lot of shots in my life, but it wasn’t right at all.  I don’t know if she dinged a nerve or what but it was absolutely excruciating.  I raised my left hand instantly.

“No.” Came the doctor’s reply.

I tried to say “STOP!” but I had a bite block in, and it didn’t come out clearly.  Master heard it though (he’s used to me talking through a gag) and he told the dentist to stop.

“Stop!  Can’t you see she’s in pain?  For fuck’s sake!  Stop!”

I started crying of course, and I even kicked my leg.  It was wrong.  I knew it was wrong.  All she needed to do was to remove the needle and reposition.  She didn’t.

Instead she yelled “HOLD HER DOWN!” to her assistant, and they held me down while I endured the entire shot.  It was so wrong.  Master sitting there telling her to fucking stop, and the dentist ignoring us both.

Let me fucking tell you something.  I’ve been through a lot of fucking medical testing.  Some of it awake, and some of it asleep.  I’ve had surgeries and I’ve dealt with people not fucking listening to me about things, but not about pain.  Every fucking time I said “Wait, stop!” they have stopped and asked me what was wrong before continuing.  It’s simple.

Hold me down?  I think I said it best on Twitter.  “This is a cavity, not some amputation in a war zone.”  I felt really angry and really fucking violated.  You want to know why no one likes dentists?  Because they are fucking ass monkeys.  That’s why.

That was the last bit that needed numbing, and I wanted to get up and walk the fuck out of the office immediately, but I could not.  I already had several teeth drilled at that point, and I needed to get them filled before leaving.  Dental pain isn’t up on my list of things I can tolerate.  So, I waited.

She drilled the final tooth and got some lady in to do the fillings.  I despise this practice.  It is very new (within the last couple years) and now, whenever I get a filling done, the doctor doesn’t do it his or herself.  I have never had anyone besides the dentist do it right.  I’ve had my teeth not cured properly which resulted in me having to come back in after a long weekend of an exposed nerve.  So there’s that.

This lady was so fucking mean.  She started filling my teeth, and Master asked her to do the front one first.  “That one isn’t going to hurt.  I’ll do it last,” is what we were told.  Obnoxious.  The dentist had even warned me that she wasn’t sure if that tooth would need a root canal because it was so deep.  So I didn’t understand why she was being flip.

She started with the most recently numbed tooth (which was a dumb idea, because carbocaine wears off quickly).  Of course, that one was fine.  The next couple were fine, too.  Then we got to another tooth that hurt really badly when she touched me.  I jumped.

“Calm down.”

“That hurt!”

“It can’t hurt, I’m not even doing anything!”

WTF?  Yes you are.  You’re poking inside the holes of a tooth with a sharp dental tool.  That’s not doing nothing.

I was already told not to tolerate any pain.  The dentist said if I had to get more numb she’d be happy to come right back in.  The bitch-lady kept working despite my pleas.  I am not shy, though. I gave her about ten more seconds of listening to her say it couldn’t possibly hurt before I turned my head to the side, yelled “Well it does!” and then “NO.”  At the top of my lungs.  Who the fuck do these fucking people think they are?  NO.

Bitch-lady fucking stood up in an angry pissy huff and said “WOW!”  Fuck that.

The dentist came running in and said “I heard you from the other room, sounds like you need another shot,” and she shoo-ed out the bitch-lady.

“YES”.  Came my reply.  Consider that I hate shots, and you’ll consider how much it fucking hurt.

As the dentist started to give me the last shot I’d need, she said “Ooh, it does look like this wore off.  No wonder you were in pain.”

::Head desk::

I was so disgusted by the actions of the cavity-filler lady that I nearly insisted that someone else fill my teeth in because I didn’t want her to touch me.  I was worried that there may not be someone else there though, and I didn’t want to make my situation worse.  So I just held tight.

Bitch lady came back to finish my teeth and she was a lot nicer.  I think she kind of felt bad because I’m sure she overheard the dentist say that I was obviously in need of more numbing stuff.  Too fucking late, lady.  I hate your guts and nothing is going to change that now.  Fucking cow cunt.

To top it off, she did a piss-poor job with my fillings.  The teeth don’t hurt but she accidentally fused one tooth to the adjacent tooth, and she didn’t get them apart properly.  (I have had that happen before, but she didn’t fix it right.)  Now my tongue keeps getting cut on jagged edges on that tooth, and it shreds dental floss because of a couple of bits that now stick out in between those two teeth like pebbles.  WTF?  My back fillings hit before other teeth making it almost impossible to chew now.  (None of my other teeth can touch, due to this.)  So, now I’m going to need to find another new dentist to fucking fix these things and that’s the last thing I want to do because these were bar-none the worst dental fillings I’ve ever had.

Master was shocked.  No one was that cruel to him when he had his teeth done at the same shop the week prior.  They were kind, stopped when he was in pain, and kept him numb.  What the actual fuck?  If you click of the “dentist” tag on my blog, you’ll see that this was definitely not the first problem I’ve ever had with a dentist.

The dentist even commented to Master about how she was surprised I came because no one who has teeth as sensitive as mine usually comes in unless they need their teeth pulled or a root canal.  I come in because missing a cleaning is disastrous for me, and because I usually get two extra cleanings per year.  I come in because I want to deal with minor chips and cracks when they are cavities, and not when they are tooth pulls.  Pulling a tooth or getting a crown or a root canal is a lot bigger issue than fixing a minor cavity.  I guess not on this day.

I’ll never go back there.  There are other dentists who take my insurance, but if we ran out of dentists, then I would only go in for emergency work until Master found a job with benefits again.  It’s not worth the torture I’ve been put through.  Fuck these people so fucking much.

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