Can’t Keep Up

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batman sweeping

I feel so wrung out these last few days, and I’m not sure what it is.  I’ve been doing better on the medicine, but it’s not as high as dose as before, so I’m still using a wheelchair or scooter here and there and I’m not keeping up with everything like a “usual” person like I was on the high dose of medicine.

Even just doing what most people see as a “relaxing” day has me getting to the end of the day thinking “I’m going to sleep so well tonight.”  That’s fine and all if you were hauling logs, but if you did some laundry and dishes and maybe wrote a blog post and fixed supper you don’t want to then be too exhausted to sit still and watch TV.  That’s how I feel.  Too tired to watch TV.  I’m getting through my days, but I feel like I’m doing too much and I’m having a hard time keeping up.  There are days where Master offers to take me out for a tea if I feel up to it, but the prospect of getting dressed or putting on shoes is too much for me so I forgo my treat.  Skipping something like that just because you’re too tired to put your shoes on seems so stupid though.  It’s not laziness, I’m genuinely too exhausted lately to do the extras.

I’m vaguely wondering if this has anything to do with my potassium.  It’s been low normal, but still in the normal range lately so we weren’t too worried but maybe it’s dipping again.  We’ll have them check at Infusion since I have a standing order.

I’m not sure if this has anything to do with the fact that we decided to add in strength training each day on top of my step goal, and maybe that’s just too much for me right now, but we’re sticking that one out because I’ve only been doing it for about a week so if it’s that hopefully as I gain some muscle it’ll improve.

We are adding in a “rest” day where I don’t wear my pedometer or do any strength training at all one day per week (so long as I got my steps six days in a row) to give my muscles a day to heal.  We didn’t originally think I’d need it since the amount of extra activity we were adding in was so minimal (1500 steps and one strength exercise??) but it’s still difficult for me, so we’re trying to bear that in mind.  It’s not that I’ll be a couch potato that day, it’s just that I won’t worry about walking in circles if need be to get all my steps or anything like that.  I’ll still do chores and stuff I just won’t wear my pedometer and I won’t do my strength training.

I feel like I’m a pace behind, with barely anything left over at all.  Usually I just do one caffeinated drink first thing in the morning to help me get going but the past week or so I’ve been having more than that.  That’s not really like me.  Hopefully I pull out of this little rut soon.  It’s sucky.

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