I have not updated in my blog about my DayZeroProject list in a while, it seems, so I thought I would do just that. I’ve ticked off a couple of things lately, but forgot to update them on the site. (Go to a renn faire, go to a kink event in Colorado, go to the top of Mt. Evans, and a few more.) I’m still working on quite a few of them, so we’ll see how that goes.
With all the stress of things going so badly lately, I’ve been doing really badly when it comes to not biting my nails. I have always had an oral fixation (I love putting things in my mouth. Not always things which should go in there either. Though, I do enjoy a nice cock as much as I can have one.), and it probably will never go away. We are doing things to try to get my fingers out of my mouth though.
For one, Master bought me a teething ball a while ago. I know they are usually rings, but mine is in a ball shape, and rattles when you shake it. It also make clicky noises and you can turn it in the middle. When Master sees me with my fingers in my mouth, he will often give me the teether ball. If I think of it, and consciously know I’m about to put my fingers in my mouth, then I will get the teether ball on my own and chew it a bit.
When I was a kid, my Mom would have me paint my nails, but since I had no desire to stop biting, that never worked. I didn’t care how bad my nails tasted, I’d keep biting. A couple of years ago, Master bought me a bottle of bittrex, but that stuff was just the worst. It’s a sort of polish that you paint your nails with, but then it makes your nails taste absolutely terrible, and it stays in your nails somehow for weeks, even if you don’t paint them. The worst part was that it would sort of get on anything I touched – a fork, Master’s dick, my pussy – everything. So I didn’t want to eat, masturbate, suck cock – none of it. Fail.
As an adult who does want to stop biting her nails though, the polish is helping me somewhat. While the taste isn’t something in and of itself that repulses me (but nor does it appetize me) when I taste the nail polish, I know that I’m biting my nails again. As silly as it might sound, I don’t even realize I am doing it anymore. When I was a kid, I did, but now – if I’m stressed, I just find my fingers in my mouth. It’s a tough habbit to break because it isn’t as though you can go a day without your nails. I’ll probably never be the girl with long nails (long nails on myself drive me nuts, they get snagged on everything, even if I file them all the time, and they are SO high maintenance too!), but if I could just stop biting them, I know that they wouldn’t be so horrible looking. Yuck.
I’ve also been working on Master’s blanket. I’m out of yarn again, so I need to get more. Seems like every time I go to type about the blanket I’m out of yarn, but if I wasn’t I wouldn’t be crocheting that much. Master is so excited, and whenever he sees it he tells me he can’t wait until it is done.
There is so much coming up in the next year that will help with my list that I’m not worried about getting it done on time. The only thing that could be tricky is that blanket, but I’m going to just keep pushing forward with it.