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Got A Little Captain In Ya?

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With apologies to Abraham Lincoln, I think I’ve found my captain, and I shall follow him to the ends of the Earth and the depths of the sea.  Captain, oh Captain, I just cannot live without thee!

Corny?  Yes. But, I have found my new favorite dildo.  It took a long time to de-throne my lovely (though made with bad materials) sil-a-gel cock, but here it is in all its glory.  The Captain Dildo by GoodVibes.

Captain is made from 100% pure silicone, and has no discernible smell to me.  When we took it out of the simple clamshell case, I was so excited to pick it up and hold it.  I squeezed it in my hands, and found that the incredibly dense silicone did not depress!  Master can make the silicone depress a bit with his hands which are much stronger, though.  This is quite a dense material with little to no give.  I do not think that any bodily orifices out there (Ok, with the exception of the mouth!) will be able to depress this toy, despite Master’s hands being able too.  It took a lot of effort on his part.

What does this mean for you?  It means you should treat this toy as you would a glass toy.  No beginners, and make sure that you can handle the measurements before you dive into this.  It is 7.5″ long, and 1 7/8″ wide.  This is a very big, very girthy toy.  Unlike glass, you’re free to thrust to your heart’s content because the material isn’t likely to bruise your cervix.  Since the toy was so dense, and felt so heavy to me compared with some other dildos, I thought it would be fun to weigh it.  Captain weighs a healthy fourteen ounces!  That is nearly a pound!

Some things which are absolutely wonderful about Captain?  Well, for starters, since he is made of silicone he is a very durable and safe toy to use.  You can boil it, use a 10% bleach solution, plain soap and water, toy cleaner, or even put it in the top rack of your dishwasher with no soap.  Remember though, if you love your Captain, to never use silicone based lubes on him.  It will degrade the surface of the toy!

I’m not usually the type of person who likes realistic looking toys.  My previous biggest dildo, Andrew, is technically realistic, but the color of the dildo is unlike any color I’ve ever seen human flesh take on.  More of an orangey tone.  Captain, on the other hand, looks realistic in a lot of ways, including the color.  I could definitely see the tone of this toy being someone’s skin color.  What stands out for me, is that the head on this toy is too exaggerated to feel like this toy is real.  I’ve never seen such a sculpted, large head!  For me, that’s the difference.  I still see this toy as being whimsical, but while maintaining a “realistic” edge.

Captain is harness compatible, because he has a sturdy base.  You’ll need a 2″ O ring.  This also makes him safe for anal play, however, I think this toy is for advanced users only as far as anal play goes.

Truth be told, I’ve only ever used him on myself as of now.  The girth of the toy is so great that he does hurt me a little bit upon insertion, but because of the straight shaft I can get him in easier than I can my next size down toy (who has a curve)!  You’re going to want to lube the toy up very, very liberally not only due to the largeness of the toy, but also due to the Captain’s matte finish.  Being very turned on, and very warmed up doesn’t hurt either.

As I said, for me (and this will differ for each person!) he hurts a little bit when I insert him, and I have a hard time getting past the head initially.  Once I get through, the rest of the toy seems to slide in with ease for the next four to five inches.  I can’t take the entire length (yet).  With a toy on my clit, Captain and me reach the big O in less than one minute.  Captain is my new best friend.  I love him to pieces.

A word of caution.  Captain isn’t completely round.  If you look at my close up-shot you can see that the first four inches or so of him are a bit wider than the base.  I find that he is more oblong in the first few inches, and that the ovalness makes is part of what makes it so hard to get in initially.  Time, patience, lube, and being very turned on all help.

He also seems to collect a bit of lint, which is pretty common with silicone toys.  I also have heard many people say that the base of the Captain functions as a suction cup.  For me, it doesn’t.  It could just be mine, but the base definitely won’t stick to anything at all.  For me, this doesn’t detract from the toy.  If you really care about the toy having a suction cup base though, then I might try something else.

Captain comes in Vanilla (pictured), Caramel, Chocolate, and Black, so there is something for everyone.  He is girthy, fills you up wonderfully, and for me, works like a charm every time.  I am in love with Captain!  5 paws for my new favorite dildo!

Thank you so much, GoodVibes, for allowing me the opportunity to try out this awesome dildo in exchange for an honest and fair review.