Seems that, while I am getting better, it is going a lot more slowly than I’d hope. Master sort of expected this. He keeps telling me that things take time, and I’m honestly getting to the point where I am starting to have more good days than bad, but, I’m still struggling a bit. The medicine the cardiologist gave me is great, but, I’m not supposed to take it all the time, just if I have to leave the house or do something strenuous. So, when I’m at home, it’s in my best interest not to take it, (hoping my body will figure things out better without it), and that makes for some interesting days. It seems like, if I have an extremely good day, it’s almost always followed up by a mediocre or bad day, and by the time I get to around eight or nine PM, I’m starting to melt.
The good news? I have been able to go to the grocery store, or run errands without coming close to fainting. I have been able to do things around the house, take little rests, and get back to things later. I have not at all had to elevate my legs above my head – I just haven’t come that close to fainting, which is wonderful. The salt tablets seem to be really helping, but I’m still recovering, and it’s not going to happen overnight.
I have been wanting to blog and email and tweet and do all those fun things that I normally do, but they have all sort of taken a back burner. Focus in this house is always on Master, our relationship, and our day to day. So, rightfully, I’m spending what energy I have on the time we have together rather than on updating this blog. I’ve been wanting to write about a lot of things. I have a lot of ideas swirling around in my head, but only so much energy in the day to write it all down, and as I get more energy (as I have today) I will slowly start typing things up.
I’m on a temporary reprieve from that punishment I am due. It is coming, yes, but Master has been waiting for me to be a bit more physically capable than I am right this moment. As I said, I am improving all the time though, so I am hoping it comes soon. I know it is weird to want a punishment, but I have felt really bad about the incident since it happened, and I feel guilty that the reason I have not been punished is that Master has been more worried about my health. Responsible, yes, but it only makes me feel guiltier. I will feel so much better once I have been punished and the incident is behind me. I feel like the guilt itself is at least part of the punishment.
So, aside from my obvious lack of quick healing, I’m feeling good. I’m in good spirits, and I’m savoring the time I have with Master. I have been camming on and off, but most days (right now) I just can’t seem to last longer than a couple of hours, and I’ve been missing a lot of days.
Packing is still coming along pretty well. It’s not at a desperate pace or anything, but we have been getting things packed up and put away. While we were packing things the other night, we decided we were going to purge one of my dressers. It’s just not going to survive a move, so we’ve been bringing drawers out to the dumpster as I empty them and the dresser itself will be gone soon too. We had a lot of massage things on top of the dresser, and most of them do not have any kind of lid for moving, packing, etc. We really don’t want to pack a couple of half-burned massage candles so I’m making the effort to give Master massages when time presents itself. Gonna use these candles up, and, Master’s worth it. I’ll buy a new candle to use on him once we move. =^^= Anyway, the other night, I was using an absinthe and sugar water scented candle on him, and we were both “arguing” on who was having a better time. Master said he was obviously having a better time because he was being massaged. I (jokingly) argued back that the smell of the candle was amazing and I got to touch feet. Ha. I guess we’re both winners. I fucking love feet. =^^= It’s always good when you both feel like you’re obviously the luckier one.
Serenade has been downright adorable. Samantha and Sabrina always hated moving. Serenade? She fucking loves it! Packing material makes crinkly noises, boxes are stacked high up for climbing, and empty boxes make good forts. Kind of cute. We find her in the cutest places ever. <3