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It’s Gonna Be Okay

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It has been almost a week since Master lost his job, and while we’re both still not happy, we’re feeling a lot better about the whole thing.  I mean, when Master initially lost his job three months ago it was a really hard process and we were grieving over it daily.  We had about two days of grief here and we’re mostly feeling okay.  It’s not that we didn’t do anything during those few days, either.  We sure did.  Master got on the phone with the heat assistance, food assistance, etc places and got those balls rolling.  We also got a letter saying we qualify for unemployment still, which was our main worry.  Now that we qualify for unemployment we’re both feeling a lot more hopeful.  Knowing that we’ll have enough money to pay the mortgage for at least a little while has us both feeling a lot more optimistic.  It is going to be okay.  I know it will.  It’s just that, in the first few days after something dramatic like this happens, it’s hard to really see that.  It’s still incredibly scary, but Master is sitting and looking for work or working on assistance programs constantly during the day.  I don’t feel completely secure and relaxed but we’re both feeling a lot better on the whole.

A few days after Master lost his job, we decided to return Serenade to the shelter.  We had her for three years, and we love her to bits and pieces, but unfortunately there was nothing left for us to do.  This had nothing to do with money.  Serenade’s biting had just reached a head for us and we could not keep living in a house with such a stressful animal.  Her new medicine was helping her a lot, but we couldn’t get her to take it after the first time she took it.  :(  We both felt like failures as far as being her caretakers, but some cats cannot be trained.  Serenade was partially feral due to being hoarded initially.  We were told that she would probably adapt with time, but it  never really got better.  We tried everything we were told, including talking to a cat behavioral specialist, and eventually we did need to give her up.  We do think she’ll be a nice barn cat for someone.  She likes to be near people, but she isn’t lovey-dovey.  With her hunting skills, we think she’ll be an excellent companion for someone, but just not us.  Her attacks continued as we couldn’t get her to take her meds (and we tried everything except physically prying her jaw open.  She was far too violent for that, and neither of us wanted to get bitten again.  We both have scars from her bites.)  It sucks, but she is at an amazing no kill shelter and we know she will be taken care of and they will eventually figure out the right home for her.

So, it has been an especially tough week for us.  Our morale is up, but we’re still worried.  Things are scary right now even if they are hopeful.  With Serenade gone, we both feel the loss, but it’s more of a relief than anything.  Even the shelter was surprised we kept her for so long and spent so much money on her trying to help her because “most people wouldn’t do that.”  Well, no one can say we didn’t try.  Our house wasn’t the right one for Serenade, but Styx is thriving here.  When we had Serenade, we felt like she was lucky to have us.  Having Styx feels like we’re lucky to have her.  It’s a much different feeling and we’re both feeling really happy that Serenade will be better off in the long run, and that our house has become a much less stressful place.