Unless They Look At Your Shoulder…

We haven’t been going out or doing much in the way of “fun stuff” lately because moving is hard, and moving quickly is just not a possibility right now. We are focused on moving as quickly as is safe though, and we’re spending a lot of time every day packing, working, and doing everything we can to get the move underway.

I did a lot the other day. A whole lot. Enough that Master Pravus thought it deserved rewarding.

“You need to go put on pants.”

He always tells me that even though I don’t even have pants. Laughs Well. We went to my closet and I picked out a pair of overalls. Then I picked up a onesie and looked over to Master Pravus. When I opened this onesie up on camera a few months ago he got wicked excited, and I thought.. Nobody would really know if I wore this out of the house. Not. I mean not really. Well, except for you (Dear Reader) and me and the Flying Spaghetti Monster.

“How about this? Would you like if I wore it (xxx) under my overalls?”

Master Pravus’ eyes got really wide and he snatched the hanger out of my hands.

“I LOVE IT! Let’s go get you dressed!” He completely took over dressing me. The look in his eyes got super excited and he undid the shoulder snaps first, slid the onesie over my head, and got really excited to do up all the buttons. After he snapped all the snaps the right one immediately came undone. His eyes lit up and my face flushed immediately as he said something somewhat humiliating. I don’t remember what his exact words were, but something about how he was going to need to fix that before we put my overalls on. He fixed it of course, looking only more excited and then popped the overalls on.

I haven’t worn overalls in a while so we both forgot that because I’m so short vertically challenged we need to cross the straps in the back or else they’re way too long. XD After we got me all set I had to brush my hair and in the middle of doing that, my right snap came undone again, since both of my arms were above my head tugging on it! He had to fix it again.

Once I was dressed and ready to go I looked myself over in the mirror and I said:

“I don’t think you can tell.” I grinned. I playfully lifted my dress up, and then I put it back down.

“See?” I said. “None the wiser. Our little secret.”

“Of course,” Master Pravus assured me. “No one will know at all.”

I stood there looking pretty smug for a minute. How clever I was to incorporate something that Master Pravus loves so much into an outing that we were going on. Something I knew that would make him smile incessantly on our trip.

As I was about to take a step forward and walk out the door he said:

“Not unless they look at your left shoulder!”

And oh my gawd I felt so dumb! LOL! How could I have forgotten about the row of buttons on my shoulder?! Ha ha ha. Still, that didn’t seem too invasive. It’s not like I was going out there flashing a nipple. So we continued on our way out the door.

One thing I realized about the onesie though, is that now that my PowerPort has been moved the snaps actually function the way we originally hoped they would! Now, I can get my fluids while I am wearing it. Lookit!

So we got in the car and the actual purpose of the trip was to go out “treat” hunting! We haven’t done that in a long time, and basically when we do, Master Pravus brings me to the store to pick out a “toy.” LOL! So, when we were in the car I kind of giggled about it and I mentioned that this might have incidentally been the perfect outfit to get a “toy” in. Master Pravus agreed that it kind of was!

When we got to the store we looked in the seasonal aisle first because they have a lot of stuffed animals there, and I have a ridiculous love of stuffed animals. Nothing really called out to me though. I did see a very, very soft little puppy but Master Pravus had no reaction to him when he touched it, and if the dog only got along with me and not him then he wouldn’t be the right fit for our house.

We had to go through the plumbing aisle on the way to the toy aisle and I saw a Vortex Plunger. It made me laugh out loud at how high tech that seemed for a plunger. I joked that if there were no toys in the toy aisle that I might want to come back for that, and Master Pravus laughed that he knew I was going to comment on that plunger. XD

Off we went to the toy aisle to find a toy and I found a couple good candidates. I have a little elephant toy that has a loop in the middle that fits around the joint in my walker that holds up my feeding tube pump. (That’s really a mouthful! LOL!) I found a similar animal toy, but it was a bunny! I considered picking it, but we weren’t sure it would fit my walker because the hole might have been too small so I passed on it. Then we found these little mini brand things that were supposed to be like real brand items but tiny!

We were going to go with that, but on the way out we saw a bin of squishy things! I saw a paw squishy but then on the package, Master Pravus saw that there was a pig squishy somewhere so he actually went through them all individually until he found the only one with a pig. I wound up putting back my Mini Brands so I could get the pig. Ha ha. It came with a puppy too, but I gave the puppy to Master Pravus. Here’s the piggy!

We went home with my piggy prize and I was really surprised to see that in the store my snaps had been fine, considering the right snap had come undone a few times as I was getting dressed. Seemed pretty lucky honestly! Well, on my way into the house, I pivoted in the car to get out of the seat and I heard and felt all three snaps unsnap! I had to go from the car to the house with the snaps undone and I was terrified they would all be hanging down while I went up the steps.

Oh man! Master Pravus even walked behind me so as cover to make sure no one could peek up my skirt on the way in. OOPS! LOL! Once I got in, I ran to a mirror to see how bad it would have been and the onesie was just barely hanging inside my skirt still. Talk about relieved!

Thank you for a fun outing, Master Pravus! And for my cute little squishy piggy. 🙂

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